A large SUV swerved into my car today knocking my off the road and causing at least 4300 dollars worth of damage. The young guy begged me not to call the police. He gave me his rolex which he says is worth 7000 dollars as collateral (I didn't ask for it, he offered it.) The whole ordeal just brings home again how fucked our society is, such that there's nothing for it but that extreme suspicion and distrust must constantly dictate our behavior. Of course I didn't call the police though and am trusting that he'll show up in the parking lot with 4300 dollars in cash on friday...
Which has my wife bringing up every possible negative scenario she can think of and trying to lecture me on the need to be completely untrusting of everyone.
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For what it's worth I've written 6 'songs' in the last week and just finished my 100th 'song'. I think 97 is my alltime favorite. Not sure what conclusions I can draw from my fundamental scale experiments yet though.
8/7, 9/7, 10/7, 11/7, 12/7, 13/7, 14/7 can actually work just fine. Not so awfully discordant as I thought it might be. Not at all really. I suppose 8/7ths is still relatively low whole numbers. I already knew I prefer 6/5 instead of 5/4... I think I need to do them all on the same instrument to more safely draw conclusions... But homegrown piano sounds bad enough that I'm not going to use it. Have to buy something... Can't buy anything till I see if this guy shows up with the 4300 dollars CASH, lol. I guess next I'll write something emphasizing thirds in meantone comma on homegrown piano, as for someone unknown reason that one sounds OK, as if there were a very few scales for which he didn't just pitch shift everything from a single note.
Showing posts with label suspicion. Show all posts
Showing posts with label suspicion. Show all posts
Monday, October 19, 2009
Once I thought of a certain person that: 'if the truth took two sentences and a lie would take one, he'd lie.' Even about trivial stuff he was constantly lying. It occurs to me it could be that he was just (and is) uncomfortable with speaking much. And also perhaps not so good with words. So he tries to keep things very short. And that perhaps he's got enough fear/nervousness in him that it causes him to say really stupid things.
Perhaps I incorrectly thought he was 'evil'? And thus in return was fearful of him and thus somewhat indifferent?
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In regard to a recent email was also thinking somewhat related that perhaps this is the main cause of indifference, that people are too busy being afraid, too busy being suspicious, fearful, too busy erring on the side of selfish caution, and thus just simply avoid others.
Over and over again I can look at indifference and see this at it's heart. Which is to say again, that it simply takes strong/happy people to be compassionate. Where 'strong' and 'happy' mean about the same thing.
Where someone can be rich and 'successful', have tons of 'friends', have great health and even seemingly be happy (to some extent...?), yet be full of suspicion of others and thus indifferent and even hateful.
And so then the obvious thing to do is to try to reduce their fear, their suspicions, and to somehow make them 'stronger' and 'happier'. The end result being that they can manage to find more time to have concern for others instead of being selfish. (This as opposed to the zombie basis for compassion. The too far future. What a good blog title that was.) The end result also being they become wiser perhaps? And thus don't need to err quite so far towards selfish caution.
But it means that at times two seemingly contradictory things must be done. You must manage to truly show them that you want them personally to be happy while at the same time making very clear that you disagree with their actions. Successfully doing that is so difficult because their suspicion gage will go into the red the moment you express any disagreement.
Perhaps I incorrectly thought he was 'evil'? And thus in return was fearful of him and thus somewhat indifferent?
---
In regard to a recent email was also thinking somewhat related that perhaps this is the main cause of indifference, that people are too busy being afraid, too busy being suspicious, fearful, too busy erring on the side of selfish caution, and thus just simply avoid others.
Over and over again I can look at indifference and see this at it's heart. Which is to say again, that it simply takes strong/happy people to be compassionate. Where 'strong' and 'happy' mean about the same thing.
Where someone can be rich and 'successful', have tons of 'friends', have great health and even seemingly be happy (to some extent...?), yet be full of suspicion of others and thus indifferent and even hateful.
And so then the obvious thing to do is to try to reduce their fear, their suspicions, and to somehow make them 'stronger' and 'happier'. The end result being that they can manage to find more time to have concern for others instead of being selfish. (This as opposed to the zombie basis for compassion. The too far future. What a good blog title that was.) The end result also being they become wiser perhaps? And thus don't need to err quite so far towards selfish caution.
But it means that at times two seemingly contradictory things must be done. You must manage to truly show them that you want them personally to be happy while at the same time making very clear that you disagree with their actions. Successfully doing that is so difficult because their suspicion gage will go into the red the moment you express any disagreement.
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