Wednesday, May 27, 2009

To change the mind of a closeminded person through the use of reason:

1. You must overcome their suspicion that your "reason" is really just something devious, like the arguments of O.J. Simpson's lawyer. You must overcome their suspicion that ultimately you just want to win arguments at all costs and control people.

If you feel that they are being closeminded you must hide your natural urge to turn to frustration, annoyance, and anger. The urge is natural because when someone is being closeminded reason is generally shut off and this leaves only force. But you must hide such honesty because the minute you express it their mind closes that much more. Because then they really see it as you wanting to force them, to control them.

A truth seeker practices the golden rule and tries to not hide things from others. One never hides things exactly because one wants others to reach all truths the same as you hope to do. But exactly by not hiding things these others see the threat of force and shut down their minds from any learning.

2. You must make it clear that no punishment awaits them if they admit they're wrong...

3. Show them that they don't lose their personal identity by changing their mind. Compliment them about other aspects of who they are. Make them feel other aspects of their persona are what's important about them.

4. Make truth become the way to happiness. An impossible task. The truth so often means focusing on negatives instead of just ignoring them. To ever actually be happy for a given moment we must indeed ignore all sufferings, both are own and that of others. For a person to truly think that truth is the way to happiness, it means looking at the negatives a lot more. We are all spending every moment trying to be happy. The question is to what degree do we focus on long term happiness or immediate short term happiness. Ignoring all negatives right now, means achieving immediate short term happiness. To think that truth is the way to happiness means focusing instead so much more on the long term.

'I had always wanted you to admire my fasting,' says the Hunger Artist. 'We do admire it,' says the impressario who employs him. 'But you shouldn't admire it' - 'Well then we don't admire it,' says the impressario, 'but why shouldn't we admire it?' - 'Because I have to fast, I can't help it.' - 'What a fellow you are,' says the other, 'and why can't you help it?' - 'Because I couldn't find the food I liked. If I had found it, believe me, I should have made no fuss and stuffed myself like you or anyone else.
Kafka, The Hunger Artist


This ultimately is probably how one instead focuses on the long term. By having a long period of time where they cannot be happy right at this moment. Ignoring negatives was not possible. So they learned to focus on the too far future and instead associate truth with happiness instead of the "fake" smile.

But zombiefying people in order to force them to focus on the longer term is no good.

You must instead recognize just what monkeys we are. Realizing to what a huge extent all disagreements are still really solved solely by force in this world. You must address them not like a civilized person (a zombie) but like the monkey they are. You must tiptoe around them concerning any disagreement, doing your best to "not make any sudden movements" lest they think you're really just trying to force them. In this way they hopefully won't automatically turn the disagreement into a battle of wills and seeing who can successfully force the other to change.
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"Why do you always have to win arguments?"
"Huh? I'm just telling you the reasoning behind my point of view. You in turn tell me the reasoning behind yours. Why would you think I'm just trying to win an argument?"