I can't stand my voice. I originally wanted to make industrial music. I thought surely you just slap a bunch of distortion and growl a bit and surely I could manage?

No. My voice cannot do industrial at all. I can sing effing country music. Which is the one type of music I have no interest whatsoever in making.

So, I post my music online really just in case my house burns down. It's an easy backup. I post this here to remind myself that I did try, oh did I. But the voice is hopeless. And that's the last attempt. Repetitive song but this is more just a reminder of how bad my voice is. Really without the telephone booth effect, forget it. My voice is just so awful. It's nasal yet very deep. How did I manage that? The best I can manage is to sound like a zombie.

Me trying to sound rageful, for proper industrial, is just funny. Arnold Schwarzenneger would make a better industrial singer. (sigh) I tried to be flexible.

With giving up any kind of vocals at all, I don't know that I'll bother trying to compose much more music. Maybe a bit of trance. Maybe some piano solos. Otherwise, I really wanted a human voice.... Oh well. Perhaps I'll experiment with some pitch shifted distorted grunts in the future...

...I had to get off 69 songs though, lol. My synethesia doesn't like the number 69. It's this dark red. A blood red that reminds me of blood. Then also it's not even remotely prime and thus unoriginal. 3, 6, 9. 23x3. No. Does the sexual connotation bother me? I don't think so...

70 is a light blue. 7 is a prime thus 'original'. 70 floats like a giant balloon that's alive. 70's good.

71 would be better actually. It's an actual prime. It's sharp and fast and original. A darker blue. It's thin but strong like steel. Unfortunately synethesia can be kind of stupid if you think about it too much.

That primes are liked because they're original/not derivatives is sort of interesting. But as to 70 versus 71. zero is like a balloon? 1 is thin and fast? That's very crude synethesia.

Why is 69 blood red? Because it's like a drop of blood welling up and hanging the moment before it falls.

I heard someone say synethesia was just cross wirings in the brain. No, I don't think so. Although yes, one can have cross wirings. I for example sneeze when I step into bright sunlight. But the idea that we'd have endless cross wirings so that we'd randomly associate all kinds of stuff that has no real association does not make sense.

The reality of synethesia is just making relatively logical associations on a mostly subconscious level.

All these 'idiot-savants' that love prime numbers. People don't understand why.

It's because they aren't connected to other numbers. They stand alone. The larger ones being more fantastic because they manage to tower right through the clouds without any help.

When I'm presented with a number, I immediately just have in mind a number of properties of the number. What it factors into. If it's a large number or say a phone number, what it would look like on a graph. Then what the number shapes bring to mind, etc. And so numbers have personalities. That's what's going on with Daniel Tammet for example.

But then the same for languages. The same for music. What else? Everything else.