Halfway through Free to be Human now. He's wrong about some things.

He's utterly ignored the fact that it feels good to be closeminded. The people who are committing 'evil' acts; committing 'sin' are generally the closeminded people who go through life certain they're right. And to be so certain feels good.

Actually as I was reading the first part of this book it was mirroring my own sentiments so exactly, that I felt vindicated and spent an evening being sure I must be right-just because one other person said the same but with more sophistication-I knew by doing so I was being closeminded and I knew it felt good and I knew I'd only spend a single evening enjoying doing such a thing.

My setpoint is to never be so certain of myself, to be full of doubt, to be openminded.

Edwards thinks those who hurt others, those who are indifferent and seek fame, and power in life are hurting themselves. He's mostly wrong. They're generally not at all like Tolstoy, they're closeminded and stupid and go through life relatively happy with never a thought for the damage they are causing. Yes, over the long term their sum total happiness is not what it could be. But in the short term it is mainly just the openminded people and the losers in corporate capitalism that are unhappy.

'Winners' like Tolstoy are the exceptions. To be intelligent and openminded, constantly questioning everything is to be less happy in this world and it takes a strong person to stand it.

Edwards is wrong to think that all these people who totally accept the norms are unhappy. They are generally more happy than those of us who recognize how pale such a life is, relatively speaking. And how morally bankrupt.
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To be meaningful is to disagree with someone. To be meaningless is to gloss over differences, to not mention them, because you're afraid of what will otherwise happen.

The worthwhile people are those you can disagree with and yet still have a reason to keep in contact with. How few such people there are for any of us in this world. It seems short of parents and the person you're fucking, there's just about none at all for most people. (If even those few.)
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Found the last promisingly intelligent person from high school. He found me and friended my on facebook. He's a libertarian and a christian. His favorite books are some procapitalist business book that I just ordered and Stephen King's Christine. He had a 160 IQ back then. Actually went off to a special school all by himself for a year before returning to one size fits all. Introduced me to Pink Floyd.

How disappointing it all is/they all are. Elitist as that sounds there's just nothing for it. They are disappointing.

I did (re)meet a guy recently who said he's addicted to learning. He's halfway through a PhD in Math but is now instead entering med school. He's also a triathlete. Mentioned he listens to lectures on everything while training. I need to start using my wife's ipod and doing the same I suppose.

Wife was envious of him in that his father is an extremely rich doctor and he's had everything on a silver platter his whole life. I don't think that should be held against him.

I played tennis against him a few times in the past. His parents spent tons of money on lessons, etc for him. He was ranked number 1 on the high school tennis team for a couple of years.

I beat him of course. I've also played basketball against a few guys who played professionally and held my own against them. I've also knocked out a few state toughman champions. How strange it all is...

I learned to play tennis by just mimicking the guys on TV and hitting a ball against a large wall. Then whenever the ball didn't go where I wanted it to I analyzed exactly what I had done wrong. I'd make a hell of a tennis coach except for having no credentials. But I've never had a lesson in my life. My net game is bad because a ball machine is extremely helpful for that and that I surely never had. My parents virtually never game me a penny for tennis. I never got an allowance, etc. They wouldn't even drive me to tournaments. Only the ones I could manage to walk to did I get to play in. (And I won those, but such were rare..)

I beat this guy who had been ranked number 1. When I tried out for the high school tennis team the coach at the time was a devil who simply pretended I wasn't there. Not even the pretense of cutting me.

Parents did nothing.

I bet he had an untroubled mind. I bet he felt quite righteous with himself treating a 14 year old boy like that. I bet he slept well and went through his days filled with pride.