It has depressed me thinking how even the relatively wise/intelligent still so often cannot manage to get along with on another. I can only at the moment think of Freud/Jung and Camus/Sartre by name as examples. But then also vaguely recall the same with so many poets, writers, etc. That combined with my own experiences make me think that eventually one reaches a point where they just quit bothering trying to have meaningful relationships as it's ultimately kind of painful when you get blown off plus there can be an increasing feeling of futility at bothering to try.

It is risky being honest!
I once heard an idea somewhere (not sure who said the original idea / quote) to the effect that that writers were being unusual in that writing is basically being gut-wrenchingly honest in public .... and that explained why the relationships of writers were a mess
so that person obviously thought that being honest should have a health warning on it: can damage your relationships

Yes. To the extent one "keeps it real," such things just end up happening so very often. And it becomes a matter of to what extent do you prefer meaningless fake relationships as opposed to no relationships at all?

My relationship with my wife is real. As with my stepfather who laughs in delight at my "realness." Mostly real with my mother, but not totally as she's not openminded enough to handle complete realness. I have one brother-in-law that can almost handle total realness. But not quite. I keep it light with my sisters.

I'm real with my friend in Orkney and I think she is the same in return. Totally, utterly real. Which is so much of what I like so much about her. But I do worry it will go eventually the way it goes so often. Which would make me pretty unhappy and her even worse... which in turn gives a lot of reason to turn it fake to stop it from going that way. Yet, ultimately I desire the real so much that I go forth for such punishment all the same. I do wonder how it is with her on this issue though. With some thoughts she's expressed the possibility of a rift would be a big concern, something to avoid at all costs. But then clearly (conceited as it sounds) I'm like an angel (I mean she should see that and I think she does) so it shouldn't be a concern. I think she can see that.

Trying to be real with others, some few very impressive people.

I'm not real at work or with neighbors...

I did spend/waste a lot of time being real on the internet with assholes. The school of hard knocks.

By 'real' I think I mean the lacanian real; total honesty resulting in perfect truth... I don't totally understand the lacanian real yet; the virtual real, symbolic real, imaginary real, imaginary virtual, symbolic virtual, the real real, etc. Gets confusing, haven't quite found the time, not sure how useful all those delineations really are.